Halloween 5


Michael lives. And this time they're ready!



Year of Release: 1989
Genre: Horror
Rated: R
Running Time: 97 minutes (1:37)
Director: Dominique Othenin-Girard


Cast:

Donald Pleasence ... Dr. Sam Loomis
Danielle Harris ... Jamie Lloyd
Ellie Cornell ... Rachel Carruthers
Wendy Foxworth ... Tina Williams
Beau Starr ... Sheriff Ben Meeker
Jeffrey Landman ... Billy Hill
Tamara Glynn ... Samantha Thomas
Jonathan Chapin ... Mikey
Matthew Walker ... Spitz
Greg Nicotero ... Guy in Gas Station (uncredited)
Don Shanks ... Michael Myers / Man in Black



Summary:

Following her mysterious behavior at the conclusion of Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers, young Jamie is committed to the psychiatric care of Dr. Loomis. Meanwhile, Michael Myers is presumed dead following a shoot-out with the Haddonfield Police and a fatal fall down a mineshaft entrance. But all is not as it seems. A well-meaning derelict nurses Michael back to health, and one year later he is back to kill again! Jamie finds herself the object of Michael's murderous rage, and along with new friends and Dr. Loomis, she tries to prevent Michael from continuing his bloody rampage.

However, there is a new visitor in town - a man dressed in black who quietly walks the streets with an unknown but sinister purpose. Why is he here, and what is his connection to Michael?


Review:

Halloween 5, remindin' us that when you find a barbecued, bullet-riddled maniac wearin' a fright mask pawin' around your pantry, the best way to handle it is to plop 'im down on a table; don't call the cops, an never question why he seems to function without nutritional sustenance of any kind. That's my advice to anybody that might be dealin' with that particular situation an happens to be readin' this. Now sure, he'll prolly spring to life one year later an spin your head around like a prisoner playin' a high stakes game of quarters in the mess hall, but those dang cops, they just ask SO many questions. Got some interestin' ideas in this one, that's for sure. How come there was never a writin' strike when THESE guys were workin' on somethin'? I guess that might be a tad unfair, bein' that it would've required pinpoint accuracy. An speakin' of unforeseen twists, I guess you all heard about what happened with our trial run of the Sage Maze on Halloween Eve. I dunno how this coulda happened, but apparently you can't trust anybody who'd voluntarily spend 12 hours a day diggin' potatoes in 110 degree weather to report anything dangerous to their supervisors. I mean, I get that that sorta thing'll get you fired on most agricultural crews, but Skunky Hernandez' cousins shoulda known he'd never fire his own kin. Mighta rubbed their faces in his armpits to teach 'em a lesson, but that's just the kinda guy Skunky is. So anyway, the demonstration we set up for the city council'd gone off exactly as planned, an the moral outrage machine'd pretty well gotten everyone in town with an ounce of free will lined up at Skunky's cattle guard to check out the maze on openin' night. It was quite a sight, we had so many little pumpkin lights spread out around the place that two flights headin' into the Boise airport came down to about 2000 feet an started askin' Skunky for landin' clearance over the CB radio. Plus we'd hidden a buncha those cacklin' plastic skulls with movement sensors inside that scare the crap outta people an make 'em so mad that they hafta stomp on 'em til they sound like James Earl Jones havin' a stroke, an even paid Bambi Pankins' rotten kids to round up all their friends an creep around the place wearin' Bill Clinton masks to freak out the patrons, so things were really shapin' up to bring in a lotta cash this year. Pretty sure that's what doomed us.

Matter of fact, we didn't even know anything was wrong for about 10 minutes cause between all the sight gags we'd stuck out there, people literally stumblin' onto their teenage kids havin' sex with the neighbor kids, an endin' up waist deep in badger holes, people'd been screamin' pretty much non-stop the entire night. But apparently we had a problem, so Skunky, Billy Hilliard an I headed into the fray to see what was goin' on an eventually ran into Sadie Bonebreak an 'er hysterical girlfriend, an she told us that they'd been attacked by a weresquatch an that Sadie hadda powerbomb it through the chassis of an old Model T that it'd emerged from to make it quit pawin' at 'er girlfriend's groceries. I figured it was prolly just Silas Tankersley drunk on moonshine tryin' to pick up chicks, but then I remembered Silas mentionin' up at the Gutter Bowl a few nights back that he'd be too busy tackin' plastic to his windows to make the premier, an that got me a little concerned. So we followed the path Sadie said she'd taken, til we found the weirdo gurglin' the chorus from Don't Fear the Reaper an kickin' his leg like somebody'd hooked electrodes up to it. Only before we could take a closer look, two more of these things jumped outta the brush an started simultaneously humpin' our calves an bitin' our upper thighs til Billy rammed the tops of their heads together like Moe Howard an knocked 'em out colder'n a Swanson TV dinner in a Siberian gulag. Once we were sure that our pant legs weren't gonna get Lewinskied, we started checkin' the pockets on their tattered clothes an come to find out that these were the three guys from Seattle that the state police never did find after last year's Sage Maze fiasco. Course, after a year out there with nothin' but jackrabbits an quail eggs to live on, they'd pretty well gone all Hills Have Eyes on us an lost touch with reality like Randy Quaid. I guess they've been moved somewhere upstate so some science guys can run tests on 'em an give 'em Snausages when they're able to demonstrate a civilized response. Sheriff Arbuckle told us that with a few more months of therapy they hope to have 'em back liftin' their pinkies while they sip their Frappuccinos, but unfortunately, the poor souls may never Twitter again due to the extensive frostbite on their primary textin' fingers. It's kinda BS when you think about it. I mean, if we coulda kept those three caged at the entrance to the maze even for one night we'da had one hell of a draw for Halloween, but no, these people for the ethical treatment of yuppies hadda show up an stick it to the small businessman an get us shut down. Like it woulda killed 'em to go one more day without a shave an a shower for cripes' sake. All that public spectacle really siphons my tank anyway, think I'll just spend tonight watchin' the Evil Dead trilogy with Apollo an Shankles an try gettin' things back to normal.

That's really what tonight's about anyway, ain't it? Watchin' classic cinema with the lights out so you can hog all the trick-or-treat candy for yourself? Damn right it is. An since it's Halloween, I checked out the next chapter in the series for those of you that've been patiently waitin' all year to see what cockamamie logic those screenwriters used to pretend it was no big deal that Michael Myers got blown apart with dynamite at the end of the last flick. But first, I've excavated a few nuggets from the gold mine of wisdom that is Halloween 5, an I'd like everybody's undivided attention while I swish 'em around in this here metaphorical gold pan. First, child to homicidal maniac ESP is kinda unreliable, an can sometimes crap out when your sister's bein' murdered, despite workin' perfectly when some new character that the audience has no attachment to becomes imperiled. It's like tryin' to pick up PBS out in a mountain cabin with nothin' but rabbit ears an some tin foil in the middle of a snowstorm. Second, it's tough to run over children when you can't get outta first gear. So if you dunno how to drive a stick, don't steal one. An third, if Michael Myers rear-ends your ride, you may as well forget about gettin' his insurance info.

I got a question though. This's what, the fifth Halloween movie up to this point? So I wanna know, where exactly does Michael Myers draw the line with regard to gettin' all his relatives buried in the bone orchard? An equally important, how's he gonna be able to find 'em all when he doesn't even know that Jamie Lee Curtis was secretly alive all along out in Hollywood holdin' out for a bigger pay day? Seriously, let's look at the facts here, now, when he originally escapes, he's ultimately only tryin' to kill Jamie Lee Curtis. He doesn't really seem to be interested at all in doin' away with his parents, who're presumably livin' on the condo circuit down in Florida where everyone's so screwed up that bein' Michael Myers' parents isn't considered a big deal. So if he ever does finally wring Danielle Harris' neck, then what? He's the proverbial dog chasin' the car. Course, if you've seen Part 6 you know that the Curtis line continued so that the studio could keep the story goin' an increase the suction yield on the ole cash vacuum, but for now, what happens if he actually whacks Danielle? Does he just dust off his hands an retire? An if so, does he eventually start goin' stir crazy like most retirees an try gettin' back into the job market? Say he gets an itchy kitchen knife hand an hasta go kill off his Aunt Ida from Kenosha, Wisconsin, just to prove to 'imself that he's still got it. Cept then he realizes he's completely outta blood relatives, an hasta go after Ida's ex-husband Hank who moved up to Nova Scotia to become a professional seal clubber just to satisfy the itch. Where does it all end? I mean, what happens if Mike's functionally immortal an lives so long that scientists finally get a firm grasp on cloning technology. Does he just pay some crooked lab assistant to continuously clone Jamie Lee Curtis an Danielle Harris each time he dispatches 'em so he'll never run outta ways to keep busy? What kinda life is that? I'm prolly just overanalyzin' things, but I'm gettin' kinda tired of sequels that bear the word "resurrection." If there's some kinda exit strategy here for Mike that I'm overlookin', I'd appreciate it if somebody'd fill me in. After all, once you've made 12 or 13 sequels, people start gettin' the idea that you're just in it for the money.

The movie begins with a recap of the endin' of Halloween 4, only this time we get to see what those absent-minded chunkheads forgot to show us, which was that Michael Myers doesn't actually get blown apart like a frog in the microwave; rather, he crawls outta this nearby drainage tunnel an body surfs down a river to safety. Somebody prolly shoulda stashed one of those floatie noodles down there in case Mike turns out to swim about as well as the little girl in Frankenstein, but it's kinda late for that now. Then Mike gets hung up in a fishin' net an flails around like a halibut with a gunshot wound, til he pulls 'imself outta there an collapses inside a fishin' shack owned by a kindly old bipedal bilge rat who proceeds to nurse the bloody, deep fried stranger in a fright mask back to health 'cause... I dunno, maybe the guy has a whole lotta bad karma he's gotta work off, let's not get philosophical this early in the movie. One year later, on Halloween Eve, Danielle Harris (Jamie) has been tossed in a home for criminally insane pre-teens with cute haircuts, an wired up to this seismograph that measures the varyin' degrees of murder rage passin' through 'er brain at any given moment. Unfortunately, Jamie's havin' a dream about the events of Part 4 that've got 'er so stressed out that the machine's scribblin' needle's goin' so fast it's about to start a fire on the print out. As if that ain't bad enough, she's inherited the genetic disorder from Mike that makes it so once you've knifed a family member you completely lose the ability to speak, so she's tryin' to use this chalk board to explain to the nurse what's got 'er so wigged out, only the nurse seems to think she needs a tracheotomy when really she's just goin' insane in the membrane cause she's watchin' Mike murder Barnacle Bill over in the fishin' shack. Fortunately, Donald Pleasence is there to slap the scalpel outta the quack's hand an tell 'im she'll be fine once she can get 'er puberty ESP under control. Some girls get periods, others get their brain waves tethered to a psycho-killer in a William Shatner mask, it's just one of the mysteries of life. The next mornin', Jamie wakes up to find Rachel (her older adoptive sister from Part 4) in 'er room, an pretty quick 'er friend (Tina) shows up at the window with the family dog (Max) an they all have this sweet little bondin' session until Donald comes in an totally poops their party. Ever wonder what Donald does between November 1st an September 30th of any given year? Spoze he just has a regular 9 - 5 job baggin' groceries at the CostCo or somethin' an saves up enough vacation time to take the month of October off to deal with Mike? It's prolly not important, forget I asked that.

Anyway, then somebody throws this brick through Jamie's window with a note readin' "the evil child must die!" an Donald tells the orderlies to be on the lookout for Gregory Peck. Then Rachel heads home so Mike can watch 'er parade around in 'er delicates, an pretty quick Jamie gets this look on 'er face like she can feel somethin' crawlin' around inside 'er feetie pajamas an starts drawin' Chain Chomps from Super Mario Brothers all over the bulletin board. Donald doesn't like this one bit, so he calls up Rachel an drags 'er outta the shower to check on Max, an when she can't find 'im Donald tells 'er to hike up 'er towel an get 'er squeaky clean keister outta there before she gets 'er hind end quartered. So Rachel runs over to the neighbor's house to sound the Haddonfield Michael Myers alarm, only the cops that show up to deal with the problem musta graduated from the same academy as Steve Guttenberg cause they can't find anything out of sorts, an to make matters worse, that's about the time Max shows up after fishin' the discarded soiled plush toy his humans tried to get rid of outta the trash can. Then Donald tries to get Jamie to write out what she thinks is goin' on, but she's more embarrassed than Sylvia Browne when she couldn't even accurately predict the year of 'er own death, an Donald decides to leave before toys start flyin' through the air towards his exposed cranium at the speed of light like in Poltergeist. Course, the reason Jamie's losin' it is because Mike's still roamin' around Rachel's house tryin' to figure out where the family keeps the towels for the guest bathroom so he can hose off an scrub the year old river scum out of his butt crack, an by the time he finally finds 'em an sees that they're monogrammed he gets so disgusted that he hasta go jam a pair of scissors into Rachel's neck before her yuppiness starts to spread. I dunno why guys get so excited about scissoring, cause that wasn't sexy at all. Then Rachel's rowdy friends who dress like Cyndi Lauper show up an can't find 'er body, the bloody footprints, the half eaten ham sammich Mike was munchin' on while she was in the shower, or a clue about much of anything really, before drivin' off with Tina's lowlife boyfriend who drives a '67 Camaro an looks like The Fonz after doin' a nickel in San Quentin. Meanwhile, Donald's still tryin' to explain to Jamie that if she don't quit with the Myers Protective Services the only appearances she's gonna be makin' in future sequels will be relegated to archive footage, but Jamie's still got 'er lips sealed up tighter'n the lid on a pickle jar, so Donald decides to go wander around the Myers house like old times an stare somberly at old memories that apparently ain't any of our business.

Elsewhere, Tina's deadbeat boyfriend's startin' up a Fonzi scheme at the corner grocery store wherein he gets his trunk loaded with beer in exchange for agreein' to quit punchin' out the jukebox, cept about that time Mike shows up an Freddy Kruegers the paint job on his Camaro with this gigantic treble hook an hasta cut bait when he gets it snagged up in the guy's skull. Then Mike puts on a Hoggle fright mask an drives over to Rachel's place to pick up Tina, which gives Jamie the hippy hippy shakes in the middle of 'er costume party til she looks like somebody just pulled 'er outta Leatherface's freezer, an she's finally able to tell Donald that Mike's parked out in front of the Stuckey's waitin' for Tina to bring 'im a heat lamp hot dog. So Donald sends approximately 700 cops over to the gas station to rescue Tina an bring 'er back to the clinic, only she won't listen to Jamie when she tries to explain that Mike can't come after her until all 'er friends're dead, an that only an idiot would go to a Halloween party with Mike cruisin' around in a classic car. Tina rolls 'er eyes an explains that when the workin' day is done, girls just wanna have fun. So Donald sends the two guys who couldn't catch Measles from an anti-vaxxer to keep an eye on 'er, an once they get out to the party all the kids pretend they're bein' attacked by Mike because the director has a 25 false scares quota he's tryin' to reach before the movie ends, which gets the Keystone cops real P.O.'d when they realize how woefully unprepared they are to handle anything more serious than a rampaging ferret. Then Tina's friends (Sam an Spitz) head out into the barn to root around in the hay an get debilitatin' jock itch, only about that time Mike shows up to inquire about some farm fresh eggs an thinks it'd be real funny to turn the tables on Spitz an see how he likes gettin' forked for a change. Sam's simultaneously P.O.'d an terrified that 'er friends're gonna start spreadin' necrophilia rumors around school, so she pulls the pitchfork outta Spitz an starts tryin' to gore Mike in the gonads til he gets ahold of a harvestin' scythe an shucks 'er cornhole. While all this's goin' on, Jamie an 'er dim-witted accomplice (Billy) have given Donald the slip an headed out to find Tina an remind all the party guests about the importance of usin' protection, an end up findin' the place right about the time Tina realizes 'er friends've been turned into haggis casserole. Course, by this point, Mike's startin' to get a little antsy about the clocks rollin' over to November 1st, so he decides to give the theatrics a rest an just run everybody over in The Fonz' car.

Cept right as he's about to strain Tina through his radiator an completely foul the engine, Jamie an Billy show up an start yellin' at 'im til he remembers his purpose in life, an starts drivin' after them until this jaywalkin' tree jumps out in front of his ride an he pretty well turns it into a prop for an after school special about drinkin' an drivin'. Fortunately, Mike had the good sense to buckle up for safety, so he gets outta the car an goes after a Jamie again til he gets cross checked into the glass by Tina, only this time he decides to cut the bullstuff an jam his butcher knife into 'er silicone implant just to watch it pop. So havin' seen that, Jamie's now sportin' more blubber per square inch than Japanese whalin' port, an hasta be dragged off by Billy til they run into Donald an the approximate number of police officers most precincts believe to be appropriate for dealin' with a 10-year-old wieldin' a pellet gun. Course, since that number exceeds the average IQ for a Mensa meetin', Mike just kinda waits for everybody to bumble around an make the world's ugliest crop circle an head out, while Donald finally convinces Jamie to help 'im now that the girl we hadn't ever seen up until a day ago has been turned into blood pudding. Then, once everybody's gone, Donald spots Mike peekin' out from behind a tree an tells 'im that he needs intensive anger management councilin', an that he's scheduled an appointment for 'im at his old house just in case he'd like to stop by an talk about that time his Dad tore the head offa his He-Man action figure an told 'im that dolls were for pussies. So Donald, Jamie, an the sheriff head over to Mike's place an set up enough security to rout the Chinese army in preparation for Mike's arrival, only Mike hasta stop by the children's clinic first to rough Billy up for tryin' to get his neice hooked on Pixy Stix, at which point he steals a cop car an rear ends the police cruiser parked in front of his pad an proceeds to tear the cop's face off to mail to Leatherface as a belated birthday gift. Mike's gone through this whole song an dance so many times that he's able to Bobby Fischer the easily led police force into gettin' the heck outta his way while he moves in for checkmate, but this's also what Donald is anticipatin', an when he sees Mike pull in he heads downstairs to try to work through some of their communication barriers. Unfortunately, negotiations go about as well the Israeli/Palestinian peace talks, an pretty quick Mike ends up breakin' the temporary ceasefire an puttin' Donald through the banister like a geriatric shot put, before headin' upstairs to slice Jamie up into Veal Oscar. Think I'm gonna cut here on account of the twist ending, even though they never got around to gettin' it resolved for another six years.

Alrighty, well, how was that? Did I mask my contempt for the writing well? Probably not. Of course, this kinda thing can happen when you've got three writers, not counting the character credits given to John Carpenter and Debra Hill. And it's just about a certainty when you figure that, between those three writers, they have a grand total of 16 writing credits for their 30+ year careers. But the thing that really makes it so disappointing is that by the time you've sat through all that bunk and things finally start to pick up near the end, you know that it truly was that single aspect that completely tanked it, because the last twenty minutes or so are actually pretty good. So about now you're prolly sayin' to yourselves; "oh come on now, it's the fifth in the series, give it a break." Well, you have a look at this list I'm about to compose and tell me if I'm overreacting or not. First, if Michael Myers and Danielle Harris have an ESP link to each other and Danielle can see where Mike is and what he's doin', how come Mike can't do the same thing and just come wipe her out in the first five minutes of the movie? I mean, at least once it's actually Halloween. The rules still apply, after all. Second (and I didn't mention this specifically in the summary because it never goes anywhere), why did they have Michael Myers dig up some random child off screen? Nevermind that it never comes up again in the movie, but do we really need a new development to help Donald Pleasence explain why it's imperative Danielle Harris help him out? Was his killin' that whole mess of people in the last movie not adequate motivation? How about the brick that comes through Danielle Harris' window early on. Anything ever come of that? Ever get an angry mob carryin' torches and pitchforks tryin' to lynch her later in the movie? Nope. And speakin' of Danielle Harris' refusal to help Donald get a bead on Michael Myers, what's that about? Donald saved her hinder in the last movie, now she's givin' him the silent treatment? I get that she's turnin' into a paranoid schizophrenic before our very eyes, but she should be used to this stuff by now, and she knows that Donald's the only one with a shot at saving her life, so what gives?

Also, how come Danielle realizes when Ellie Cornell's in danger, but has no idea she's dead until the end of the movie? Does the ESP stop working when things escalate beyond attempted murder? Does she have some kinda pre-teen V-chip inside her head that turns off the ESP when things get too graphic? So about now you're thinkin' "alright, fine, those are a little problematic, but..." Hold on, I'm not done yet. Why are there comic relief cops in a Halloween movie? Anybody? This kinda comedy is more akin to something you'd see in a Troma movie, except in the Troma movie you might laugh cause Troma movies are SUPPOSED to be funny. Oops, I forgot the one that happens right outta the chute, how come the old man that rescues Mike after he gets washed downstream like a styrofoam worm container doesn't think anything's strange when the Mike never wakes up, eats, drinks, or says a word? All they had to do was slap one of those tattoos from the subplot on that guy and it would've at least kinda made sense. And lastly, what changed between Parts 4 and 5 that makes killing Danielle Harris such an afterthought? Mike's whole purpose in life is supposed to be to kill off the members of his family, it started with Jamie Lee Curtis back in 1978, and he's been workin' towards that goal ever since. But here, the guy drives all the way out to some party in the sticks to kill our new supporting actress (because they brilliantly killed off their primary supporting actress in an attempt to make you think that anybody can die at any moment, even though it meant there was absolutely no logical reason why Mike would care if this new girl lives or dies), when Danielle Harris is a sittin' duck over at the children's clinic. Cripes almighty, did any of these guys ever watch the original Halloween, or even Part 4 so they'd have at least SOME idea of what they were gettin' into? And why were there three writers in the first place? Every studio really oughta know that the more writers you've got, the more likely they are to trip all over each other's feet, and it's pretty clear that happened here. This is just unacceptable, a fan fiction script would have been better, because at least fans have a basic understanding of the rules and motivations of the characters involved. The screenplay on this thing would need extensive rewrites just to reach "terrible" status, this is abysmal.

Sorry about that, but it needed to be said. Trust me, I don't take brutalizing a sequel to a classic movie lightly. In any event, let's flush this thing down the sewage tunnel and see if it survives the brown water rapids. The plot, well, if you read that last section you're probably pretty clear on my feelings regarding the plot. Toilet time on that portion. When terrible decisions aren't being made, senseless ones take center stage. The acting is as good as you can expect when the actors are all going up against a script this asinine. Danielle Harris is still really good as the tormented Jamie, particularly in the earlier half of the movie where the character's lost her voice and she has to act entirely with facial expressions. So she's still really good. Donald Pleasence is still pretty good too, only Donald doesn't get nearly the kinda screen time necessary to keep the movie afloat. If nothing else, anytime you've got a scene with Danielle AND Donald in it, things're alright. But what really borks the movie is Wendy Foxworth as Tina. Now, I don't mean that she's necessarily a bad actress, because she isn't, the problem is that the writers opted to kill off Ellie Cornell's character and essentially thrust Wendy into a critical supporting role. They did this when Wendy was not in the previous movie, and despite her character not really being the type that people can relate to. To me, this smacks of somebody pulling strings to get her into that role, because nothing else makes any sense. Then again, the whole plot makes no sense, so maybe the studio genuinely thought this was a good idea.

Here's who matters and why, less Donald Pleasence and Danielle Harris, who're pretty well established, at least in genre movies: Ellie Cornell (The Thirst, Room 6, The Darkroom, House of the Dead 1 & 2, Halloween 4), Beau Starr (Final Days of the Planet Earth, Halloween 4), Jonathan Chapin (Twice Dead), Matthew Walker (Child's Play 2), Wendy Foxworth (The Labyrinth), Troy Evans (The Frighteners, Alien Fury: Countdown to Invasion, Phenomenon, Here Come the Munsters, The Stand, The Lawnmower Man, Martians Go Home, Deadly Dreams, Near Dark), Frankie Como (Ghostbusters), David Ursin (Solar Crisis, My Mom's a Werewolf, Critters 2), Harper Roisman (Ed and His Dead Mother, The Unnameable II), Karen Alston (Halloween 4), Max Robinson (Silent Night Deadly Night, Hanger 18), Jack North (Deadly Invasion: The Killer Bee Nightmare), Russ McGinn (Neon City), Jay Bernard (The Philadelphia Experiment, Slaughter of the Innocents, Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat), Angela Montoya (Silent Night Deadly Night), Steven Anderson (When a Stranger Calls, The Stand, Bad Dreams), Donre Sampson (Firestarter 2, Deadly Invasion: The Killer Bee Nightmare, The Stand, Halloween 4), John Gilbert (Asylum 2007, Rats 2000, Dead Leaves, Rabid), Don Shanks (I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer, Urban Legends: Bloody Mary, The Crow: Salvation, Legion of Fire: Killer Ants, Halloween 4). Greg Nicotero has a little bit part here too, as he often does in the flicks where he's working on the special effects. There is one fairly prolific character actor in here (besides Donald Pleasence) who's done some things regular folks might've seen, Troy Evans, who played Roger Podacter in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, Frank Martin on ER, Sgt. Pepper on China Beach, and voiced the character of Thistle Jinn in Epic.

The special effects are probably even tamer than they were in Part 4, which is due to the fact that they were fighting an X rating (again). The IMDB even lists it as being rated X, although the home video releases list it with an R. I do think they did a better job on the effects in this one, due in no small part to Greg Nicotero and KNB Efx. Although simply getting rid of the terribly obvious dummies used in Part 4 probably puts it head and shoulders above that particular sequel. I'd imagine most of KNB's best work ended up on the editing room floor, because there really isn't a whole lot to see here in terms of volume. Most of what we do see is pretty good though; there's the deep fried hands/face of Donald Pleasence and Michael Myers (which were present in the last movie as well, but done more convincingly here), a pretty good pitchfork in a back scene, that three pronged gardening tool that gets stuck in the face of Wendy Foxworth's lowlife boyfriend, and the pair of scissors in the neck of Ellie Cornell. Of course, you never get to see the penetrations on any of these effects because we as a society are apparently not capable of handling that, but that's not KNB's fault, and I think that everything they actually got onto the screen comes across rather well. The shooting locations, or at least the big one, are problematic when looked at in the context of continuity. The Myers house is just laughable when compared to the original, as they look nothing alike and aren't even the same color. This is a rare occasion where the shooting locations actually are pretty important due to their iconic nature, and they blew it big time. The other locations of less consequence are fine, including the children's clinic and the house/barn outside of town where the party occurs, but there's no salvaging the botched Myers house. They did at least use the same store from Part 4 when the "man in black" gets off the bus, so there's that, and the house where Danielle Harris' family lives looks to be the same building. The soundtrack was done by Alan Howarth, the same guy who did the soundtrack from Part 4, and it really shows. The two soundtracks are remarkably similar, and it honestly sounds to me as though he used up all his A-material for Part 4, possibly not realizing he'd be called upon again to compose for Part 5. To be fair, there're only so many ways you can rehash Carpenter's original iconic theme, but these tracks just feel like they took the music from Part 4 and tweaked them slightly, and not for the better. Part 4 really had an excellent soundtrack, but this one just sounds like a lesser son of greater sequels. Overall, you'd think Part 5 would be very similar to Part 4 given that it has all the principal actors returning, a similar soundtrack, and the fact that it was shot in the same area, but despite the superior special effects, the plot really tanks it. Overall, it's a Halloween sequel, so no amount of warning will ever stop anyone from watching, so my commentary is intended strictly to minimize everyone's disappointment going in. Just don't expect too much, is the best advice I can give.


Rating: 57%